I miss my muse. Oh, how I miss my muse. I miss the comfort of doing something I really want to do. I miss the peace of being focused and working. I miss the satisfaction of seeing something get done. I miss being able to plan a day and living it.
I am submerged in chaos. I am without the safety of my routine within the refuge of the home I built around me. I want my studio back and my blesséd routine.
Ordinarily I start my day by reviewing the world within my walls and putting everything in order. I had a dear friend who once said that she and I needed to have everything at right angles to everything else. Well, sure ‘nuff. When the dishes are washed, the bed is made, and the bills are paid, my world is in place and I go to work. I can walk away from it all and into that place in myself that paints. I can forget everything for a while knowing that my reading chair and refrigerator will be waiting when I need them again. The phone is there too; I can temper the loneliness by dialing one of my kids. I can rest so that I can do the same next day. Is that a lot to ask?
Yes, of course it is. It is the never promised rose garden. Experiencing a minor bump in the road like moving one’s domicile, demonstrates yet again just how good a life this is. No tornados here. No major earthquake, no disaster nor tragedy of any kind. I’m moving from one very comfortable space to another that will be even better. Who would ever even think of complaining? Just a mega-kvetch, that’s who. Well, okay, a very, very tired mega-kvetch.
The half-price moving sale of paintings dated prior to 2007 and that I am not currently marketing will continue until the studio is packed, sometime in the the week of the twenty-third. The final move is scheduled for the last weekend of this month. Email me at joangold@humboldt1.com for images and prices or for information or a studio appointment. The image above is Allegro ©2000, 10" x 26.5” . It is hanging in my studio and included in the sale.
Dear Joan,
ReplyDeleteI know what you are talking about, have just been through a similar "disturbance" .....my muse have abandoned me for almost a month (my trip and weeks of anxiety before being the reason....I think!)....it's a creepy experience........but guess what......the creativity will not only come back....you'll be even more inspired through this unpleasant change.....so keep up the long-term vision if you can!!!! All the best....thinking of you, dear friend!
This is more like a case of the muse being abandoned. I was the disloyal recipient of her grace and have now turned my back on her. My plan is to return with ever greater devotion. But if she doesn't wait?
DeleteWhen I Met My Muse
ReplyDeleteI glanced at her and took my glasses
off-they were still singing. They buzzed
like a locust on the coffee table and then
ceased. Her voice belled forth, and the
sunlight bent. I felt the ceiling arch, and
knew that nails up there took a new grip
on whatever they touched. "I am your own
way of looking at things," she said. "When
you allow me to live with you, every
glance at the world around you will be
a sort of salvation." And I took her hand.
-William Stafford
What can I do to help with your move?
Thank you, Spiffer. I didn't know William Stafford. I plan to read more of him. He's on my library list now.
ReplyDeleteKvetch away! Moving sucks.
ReplyDeleteNever again. The next move will be to the next world.
ReplyDeleteJ.